Wednesday, June 5, 2019

OSR: False Magicians

Would you like to teleport, shoot fire out of your eyeballs and melt people by glaring at them?  Would you like to be a Wizard or a Magic-User?  Of course you would!  Who wouldn't want the insane powers that many Wizards have.  Most people would do anything to have even a fraction of the power many Wizards possess.  Yet for most people, this is simply impossible.

Disregarding the financial and social difficulties associated with becoming a Wizard or even an unlicensed Magic-User, there is one major problem.  Magic is a skill, with associated talent.  And most people simply don't have the talent to learn magic like Magic-Users do.  For these people, they will just have to accept the fact that they will never be as strong as even a lowly Hedge-Witch.  There are only a couple of options for these people.  They can either get some help or give up on their dreams of power.

Or, they can choose a third way.

                                                           by Abigail Larson

Artificers, Alchemists and Mountebanks

Mountebank is the general term that refers to the so-called "half-casters".  These are people with enough magical talent that they can do some tricks with magic, but not enough to cast spells.  They are the impoverished underclass of the magical world, shamans and psychics and monks, forever hobbled by their lack of potential.  Wizards and Magic-Users look down on them, either scornfully or with pity, two reactions that Mountebanks despise.

The Mountebanks often pretend to be real Wizards as long as no real Wizards are around, using sleight of hand and deception to convince ignorant onlookers that they are real Wizards.  This is not that difficult on the frontier, as long as one possesses the right tools and is dealing with some inbred, toothless peasants.  In the cities though, it can be quite hazardous, as in such places, waving around a counterfeit Wizarding certificate may not just lead to embarrassment or public shaming, it could be illegal.

In places more like the latter, Mountebanks hide their true nature, pretending to be scholars or students, which is also partially what they are.  This is not because being a Mountebank is illegal, it isn't.  But it is rather embarrassing to many of them.  For while common folk might be wowed by even their paltry magics, they know what real power looks like, and have to reckon with the fact that they will always fall short.                                                

Starting HP: 1/3 of Con
FS: +2 per Mountebank level
Starting Equipment: Coat with many pockets, book of JuJu Blueprints, 1d4 JuJu Blueprints, Starting JuJu (see below), Sword (1d6+STR sharp) or Staff (1d6 blunt)

Starting JuJu
1- Talking Glasses.  These glasses have a spirit bound to them and the spirit can speak to anyone who wears or is touching the glasses.  The spirit cannot leave the glasses but is highly intelligent and verbose.  Additionally, it remembers everything anyone wearing it has ever seen, heard or felt, speaks ten languages that you don't and is insufferably smug most of the time. 
2- Grenado.  See below for more details.  Just be careful with it.
3- Lollipop.  A bright, colorful lollipop that glows in the dark.  Anyone who looks at it must save or be entranced by the calming, flickering glow.  Licking it forces someone into a trance-like state where they drift in a sea of pleasant, unfeeling calm for 1d8 hours, or until jolted out of it. 
4- Puppet.  This Puppet has no special powers.  Yet is is incredibly important.  You must hold onto it, for reasons of cosmic importance.  Everyone else thinks the Puppet is creepy.  As long as you have the Puppet, you get a permanent +1 bonus to all stats and damage rolls.  However, once you lose the Puppet, this bonus vanishes. 
5- Lucky Seven Sphere.  A black sphere with a small piece of glass and strange, dark liquid floating in it.  Ask it a question and shake it.  Then the Referee should roll 1d6 to see what it answers your question with: 1d6 [1= "Outlook not so good; 2= Odds are not in your favor; 3= Do not count on it; 4= Signs point to yes; 5= Outlook Good; 6= It is certain.]  What you do not know is that these answers are entirely random and that the Lucky Seven Sphere has no real magical power.
6- Cueball.  A perfectly smooth, white sphere that is slightly smaller than a cantelope.  If you ask the Cueball a question, it will do nothing.  Then, the next night, you will have a dream where a man with white skin in a white suit with white eyes will approach you and ask if you are willing to pay his price.  If you say yes, he will answer the question.  The answers he gives are always right.  If you say no or ask what his price is, you will immediately wake up with no answer.



Spellcasting Dice: As a Wizard.  You have a number of Spellcasting Dice which you must roll when creating JuJus.  You can also use your Spellcasting Dice to charge JuJus.  Your dice function as a Wizard's, meaning they burn out on a 5 or 6, are recovered after a long rest and if you roll doubles or triples on them, they cause a Disaster.

JuJu Master: You have the ability to create JuJus, which are lesser magic items that need to be charged by spellcasting dice.  Creating a JuJu requires mostly mechanical and technical knowledge, so not just anyone can do it.  But JuJus cannot be created on the fly.  Building one requires time, materials and effort and takes hours, days or weeks, depending on complexity.  Additionally, most Mountebanks, including you, cannot design their own JuJus, and rely on Blueprints concocted by others of their kind.  You begin with a certain number of these.   

Not a Wizard: You aren't a Wizard.  You can't cast spells or store them in your brain.


Sketch: When you come across something dangerous, you may take an action to observe it and draw a picture of it.  Then make a Check with an appropriate DC, as determined by the Referee.  If you succeed at this check, you can create a special JuJu based on what you observed.


Safety Procedures: Once per day, you may substitute any result you roll on your Spellcasting dice with a 1.


Quick Construction: If you have the Blueprints for a JuJu, you can build it in 10 minutes per hour it would ordinarily take, so 5 hours would equal 50 minutes of intensive labor.


Manual Override: If you are touching a JuJu, as an action, you can make a Check with a DC equivalent to the JuJu's complexity.  If you succeed the Check, you can take manual control of the JuJu or destroy it.  Referee's Discretion applies on how complex a JuJu is.


Innovation: You can combine two JuJus into one, to create a new JuJu with some of the properties of both.


Comptroller: If you are touching one, you can divert or draw power out of a JuJu, or infuse power into it as an action.


Inventor: With the Referee's permission, you may make your own JuJu.  This requires extensive amounts of time, resources and other experiments.  It is not something done over night.  Referee's Discretion applies.


Ubercharge: You can cause a JuJu to overcharge and become much more powerful than it is.  This makes the JuJu much more powerful for a brief time, but causes it to malfunction.  The JuJu will then need to be repaired before it can be used again.

                                                   by Vera Velichko

To the Lab!

Mountebanks generally divide themselves into two groups- the Artificers and the Alchemists, though it should be noted that these are not hard and fast distinctions, and plenty of Mountebanks dabble in both or do not favor one over the other.

Alchemists are the more common of the two groups, selling their services to many petty Kings and Merchant-Princes.  If you can't afford a Wizard, an Alchemist is often just as good.  Alchemists who are not employed by lesser nobility usually work for commission and will brew you a potion or two, for the right price.

Let's see what the Alchemists have cooked up today.

Potion of...

1- False Death.  Makes whoever drinks it fall into a coma that resembles death for [sum] hours.  Ingredients: nightshade berries, bear blood, human bone powder. 
2- Oblivion.  Makes whoever drinks it unable to be seen, heard, smelled, tasted or touched for [dice] minutes.  However, objects they touch can be seen and affected by all other people.  Additionally, if the person who drank the potion acts to directly affect a person, that person can sense the person who drank the potion.  Ingredients: corpse ash, reliquary dust, rotting plums, a piece of bone jewelry, the name of a man no one remembers. 
3- False Life.  Whoever drinks this potion gains 1d8+[dice] HP, but the person loses the HP after [dice] minutes.  Ingredients: Peacock feathers, chameleon skin, eye of newt, dandelion. 
4- Greenblood.  Whoever drinks this potion turns green and as long as he is in sunlight, he recovers [dice] HP a round.  Ingredients: flower petals, heartwood from a maple tree, pollen.
5- Become Beast.  Whoever drinks this potion is transformed into an animal as per Wild Shape for [dice] hours.  Ingredients: a hair, tooth or scrap of skin from the animal you wish to become; an abandoned cicada molt, a chrysalis.
6- Become Person.  Whoever drinks this potion is transformed to exactly resemble a specific person.  Ingredients: a hair, tooth or scrap of skin from the person you wish to become; a tiny mask; an adultress or adulterer's blood; blood money.
7- Steelskin.  Whoever drinks this potion has his skin turn hard as steel and gains a natural AC of 12+[dice] for [dice] minutes.  Ingredients: moose blood, steel or iron shavings, badger fur, cockroach shell.
8- Camouflage.  Whoever drinks this potion finds his skin will change color and texture to match whatever his environment is, giving him a +[sum] bonus to all stealth checks and saving throws for 1d6+[dice] minutes.  Ingredients: clear liquor, an owl feather, a temple mouse's tail, a token from a master thief.
9- Regeneration.  Whoever drinks this potion has his HP restored to full and regenerates any lost body parts.  Ingredients: wine, a token from childhood, honey, a troll heart or a unicorn horn.
10- Sense Soul.  Whoever drinks this potion gains the ability to sense all souls within 100' of them for [dice] minutes.  All attempts at sneaking up on them fail, unless the creature is soulless.  Ingredients: pure water, glass beads, a shiny stone, a cat's eye.
11- (Martial) Glory.  Whoever drinks this potion gains a +[dice] bonus to all damage rolls and the ability to make a number of bonus attacks equal to [dice] for [dice] rounds.  Ingredients: moose fur, sweat from a warrior, iron shavings, crushed ants or honeybees.
12- Pass Without Trace.  Whoever drinks this potion can still be seen or detected through a living creature's senses, but will leave no evidence he was ever there, except for the memories of anyone who saw him.  This effect lasts for [sum] minutes.  Ingredients: rabbit's blood, a deer tail, a snipe feather, a memory.
13- Youth.  Whoever drinks this potion is reduced in age by [dice]d20 years or back to their physical prime.  This potion cannot regrow lost limbs or other lasting damage.  Ingredients: tortoise blood, a blessed object, gold flakes, a tooth from a living creature.
14- Wisdom.  Whoever drinks this potion temporarily receives great wisdom and knowledge.  The drinker may ask the Referee [dice] questions and the Referee must answer them truthfully.  Once these questions are asked, the effects of the potion fade, but the drinker will still know the answers to the questions he asked.  Ingredients: a talking frog's guts, crocodile tears, a token from a woman, a crown of flowers. 
15- Night Eye.  Whoever drinks this potion will be able to see perfectly in the dark, no matter how dark it is for [sum] minutes.  However, any source of light brighter than a candle will dazzle him, forcing him to save or cringe away from the light.  Ingredients: black rum, a wolf's eye, cat hair, a lion's tooth or a tiger claw.
16- Sight Beyond Sight.  Whoever drinks this potion gains Sight Beyond Sight, which is vision that pierces all illusions, invisibility and reveals things as they truly are.  This lasts for [dice] minutes.  Ingredients: milk, a drop of king or dragon's blood, a small diamond, an opal.  
17- Purity.  Whoever drinks this potion has any poisons, toxins or diseases purged from his body.  Ingredients: a maiden's blood, holy water, sesame oil, sunflower petals.
18- Animal Kinship.  Whoever drinks this potion will not be attacked by animals and will gain a +[sum] bonus to interacting with animals for [dice] hours.  Ingredients: butterfly milk, a silk ribbon, honey, blackberries.
19- Water Breathing.  Whoever drinks this potion can breath water for [dice] hours.  Ingredients: sea or lake water, a dead fish, the breath of a living creature, blood or tissue from a air-breathing water dweller.
20- Cloud Walking.  Whoever drinks this potion can walk on clouds, mist or smoke as if they were solid ground for [sum] minutes.  Ingredients: sugary tea, a piece of fur from a skydweller or a bird, flesh or blood from a Water Elemental, spicy peppers.

                                                          by Andy-Butnariu

Additionally, Alchemists are also known to sell Anti-Potions, which are still technically potions, but rather then drink them yourself, you give them to your opponents through stealth or simply throw the bottle at them.   

Anti-potion of...

1- Flammability.  Whoever drinks the potion or has it poured on him begins sweating a highly flammable substance for [dice] minutes.  If he is exposed to fire, the substance will combust and he will burn for the rest of the duration.  Ingredients: water, honey, magnesium, sawdust.   
2- Animal Animosity.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him attracts animals which are automatically hostile for [dice] hours.  Ingredients: blood from a dead bear cub, honeycomb, a rotting fish, veal steak.
3- Nausea.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him is overcome with nausea and empties his stomach onto the floor.  Ingredients: sweaty, filth undergarments, ear wax, a fat man's hair, flesh of the alchemist's race.
4- Lightning Love.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him attracts lightning strikes for [dice] days.  Ingredients: molten gold, a silver ring, a piece of fulgrimite, a copper cord. 
5- Fishblood.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him can only breathe water for [dice] hours.  Ingredients: a shark's tooth, a live clam, crab guts, a fish's heart.
6- Become Other.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him becomes a hideous, alien monster for [dice] days.  He also loses the ability to speak or cast any spell that does not harm.  Ingredients: a destroyed image of a person, a broken piece of jewelry, a treat stolen from a child, a lost or abandoned toy.
7- Luminosity.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him glows in the dark.  Ingredients: a firefly, a peacock feather, a cicada shell, a butterfly.
8- Zombification.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him dies and is reanimated as a zombie.  The drinker is still conscious, but trapped inside his rotting body, feeling everything that is happening to his body until it is destroyed utterly.  Ingredients: token from a scorned woman, a necrophiliac's kiss, grave dirt, a stolen bone.
9- Skeleton Hatching.  Whoever drinks this potion has his skeleton hatch and rip its way out of his body.  This is usually, but not necessarily fatal.  Ingredients: a skull, enough blood to immerse the skull, a bandage, a vulture feather.
10- Cloudkill.  Whoever drinks this potion dies.  If the potion is instead poured out, it creates a cloud of toxic gas over 10*[dice]' that does [sum] damage, save for half, to anyone inside it.  Ingredients: poisoned well water, rotting corpse's flesh, a child's diaper, rotten eggs.    
11- Petrification.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him turns to stone.  Ingredients: lava or molten metal, scrapings from a statue, sand, a shiny pebble.
12- Disintegration.  Whoever drinks this potion has his body turn to dust, instantly killing him.  Pouring this potion on someone does not affect them in any way.  Ingredients: acid, a destroyed piece of art, sand, the scraps of a poem. 
13- Intoxication.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him becomes as drunk as if he had spent the whole night drinking.  Ingredients: liquor, wine, salt, a broken tea cup.
14- Disfigurement.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him becomes hideously ugly.  The change is permanent.  Ingredients: acid, a disfigured mask, hair or tissue from an ugly animal, spit from a bitter old man or hair from a spiteful crone.
15- Sensory Deprivation.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him loses up to [dice] of his senses for [sum] minutes.  Ingredients: liquor, a blind eye, an ear, an infirm man's spit.
16- Hunger.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him develops cravings that can only be sated by the flesh of his own race.  These cravings last for [dice] weeks, but if indulged in, self-perpetuate.  Ingredients: poison, flesh of the alchemist's kinsmen, a page from an evil book, ink or paint made from blood.
17- Plague.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him contracts a horrific disease.
18- Cryostasis.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him is frozen in ice, to be preserved for up to [dice] years, or as long as it takes for them to thaw.  Ingredients: warm milk, an Ice Queen's sweat, a flower, a rag bearing a maiden's scent.
19- Viscosity.  Whoever drinks this potion or has it poured on him has his blood start to thicken and if he does not keep doing impressive things to keep his heart pumping fast, his blood will stop flowing and he will die.  Ingredients: wine, bitumen, pitch, cypress wood shavings.
20- Detonation.  Whoever drinks this potion takes [sum] damage as the potion explodes in contact with mana.  If this damage is enough to kill him, he instead explodes, painting the walls with his blood.  Ingredients: water from a hot spring, sulfur, spicy peppers, a Fire Elemental's blood or seed. 

This is not the limit of the Alchemist's trade, of course.  Alchemists can also make things such as poisons, acids and drugs. They don't usually advertise these latter facts, as the people who buy these products tend to favor discretion.

                                                     by butterfrog

Then there are the Artificers.  Artificers are the rarer of the two groups and generally work for themselves or for a group of Artificers.  They are dungeon-crawlers and tomb-robbers, seeking out pre-Diluvian magics and JuJus long lost to the sands of time.  An Artificers creations last much longer than the Alchemist's, but they are unimaginably more expensive and more difficult to create.  For example, while most Wizards could easily learn Alchemy in a couple of weeks, being an Artificer requires much more additional education on subjects such as biology, physics and philosophy. 

Artificer Creations

1- Predator Goggles.  When turned on, the goggles let you see heat signatures for up to [dice] hours.  Time to build: 3 hours.  Require goggles, snakeskin, metal wire and bio-luminescent secretions.
2- Makeshift Man.  A primitive construct with [sum] HP, AC 12+[dice] and Atk +[dice], making 1 1d6+[dice] Slam attack.  Time to build: [dice] hours.  Requires large amounts of wood, mud or clay; a metal or bone skeleton; a mask.
3- Spell Mirror.  This mirror reflects up to [dice] spells.  If you are holding this mirror up when someone casts a spell on you, the mirror reflects that spell back at whoever is reflected in the mirror.  Time to build: 10 hours.  Requires: A mirror, magic-conducting paint, silver thread.
4- Living Cord or Heartstring.  When activated, a rope that behaves as if it is alive, acting as a [dice] HD creature with AC [sum] and the ability to tie itself into knots.  Can move and act independently for up to [dice] hours.  Time to build: 1 hour.  Requires: A rope or cord, animal or human sinew, gold dust. 
5- Ghost Cage.  When activated, forms a prison that can trap a purely spiritual entity, such as a Ghost or an Outsider without a host.  Can trap a creature up to [dice] HD or Damage Threshold equal to the same, but any creature stronger then that can make a Saving Throw to try and escape.  Time to build: 10 hours.  Requires: a glass box, four small mirrors, gold wire, silver wire, copper wire, mercury, a topaz, diamond, ruby, sapphire, emerald and opal.
6- Artificial Limb.  An artificial prosthetic that works as a normal arm for [dice] hours.  Depending on the model, you may be able to perform some great feat of strength or power with your artificial arm, temporarily making STR checks with the limb with a +[dice] bonus or fire bolts of magical energy from your limb, doing 1d6+[dice] damage on a hit.  Time to build: 1d20+[dice] hours.  Requires: Metal, wood, bone, ivory base; gold wire; silver wire; a lock of hair from the person who will wear the limb; leather cord; rawhide; enough blood to immerse the whole limb in.   
7- Grenado.  A bomb.  Explodes for [sum] damage, affecting everyone within 10*[dice]' of the explosion, save for half.  Those beyond this range instead save to take half damage on a failed save or none on a successful save.  Those more than double the initial radius away automatically take no damage.  Time to build: 1d8 hours.  Requires: Charcoal; Demon shit; a drop of blood from an easily angered man, horse or child; cinnamon; juniper berries; holly leaves; acorns; sulfur; and a metal casing.
8- Tin Soldier.  A tiny, moving metal toy.  Can look like a tiny man or a tiny animal.  If built like a bird, can also fly. Can fly or move for [dice] days.  They are very fragile, however.  Time to build: 1 hour.  Requires: small metal parts, gears, wire, glass beads, human blood. 
9- Bag of Holding.  You know what a bag of holding is.  Comes in various colors, styles and sizes.  Can hold up to [sum] items, regardless of how big the bag is.  Time to build: [sum] hours.  Requires: a bag, crushed gemstone dust, bone powder, ground up stomach, hermit krab or fur from an animal with a pouch. 
10- Folding Sword.  A sword that magically collapses and re-emerges with a free action.  Does damage as a normal sword.  Doesn't necessarily need to be a sword, just an edged weapon.  Time to build: 2 hours.  Requires: A sword, a pretzel, grease, lard, oil, a book. 
11- Gliding Cloak.  A cloak that when triggered, automatically stiffens to enable the user to glide through the air.  Time to build: 6 hours.  Requires: A cloak; gold, silver and brass wire; a goose feather.
12- Buzzblade.  A terrifying instrument of pure destruction; a blade that moves and cuts by itself.  The blade does [dice]d6 damage on a hit and can be started up [dice] times before it needs recharging.  Time to build: 10 hours.  Requires: Gears; a metal chain; a custom circular blade; a wooden handle; gold, platinum and occultum; lion's blood; shark's teeth.  
13- Lucky Coin.  A coin that, when flipped, always gives you the result you desire.  The coin can also shapeshift into any type of coin or teleport back to the owner.  It can only change its shape or teleport back to you up to [dice] times before it needs to be recharged.  Time to build: 1 hour.  Requires: A coin, a four leaf clover, a rabbit's foot, sweat from the brow of a thief. 
14- Ray Gun.  A weapon that fires a blast of crackling magical energy, doing 1d6+[dice] damage to anyone it hits.  The Ray Gun can fire [dice] shots before it needs recharging.  However, this JuJu can be recharged on the fly as a full action.  Time to build: 20 hours.  Requires: a complex metal housing; some glass lenses; a piece of clear crystal; platinum and silver; a diamond; scorpion venom.
15- Shapeshifting Armor.  This is armor that can transform itself into any outfit you can imagine.  Then, as a free action, you can cause it to transform back into armor.  The armor can transform [dice] times before it needs recharging.  The armor itself has the original AC it did before you altered it.  Time to build: 5 hours.  Requires: A suit of armor, ribbons, magic-conducting paint, a small piece of jewelry, liquid hope.   
16- Skeleton Key.  This strange device can unlock any non-magical lock, within 1d6-[dice] round, though the minimum will always be one round.  Time to build: 6 hours.  Requires: A spring; some gears; tons of wire; a series of thin, metal rods; fragment of a Thief Eagle's egg.  
17- Razorang.  A razor sharp boomerang that always returns to you, no matter what.  Does 1d8+[dice] damage on a hit.  Time to build: 2 hours.  Requires: powdered bloodlust, a boomerang, a whetstone, badger teeth.
18- Moral Compass.  A compass that once calibrated can find the greatest source of Law, Chaos, Evil or Good in the nearby vicinity.  Requires an initial sample to calibrate it.  Time to build: 20 hours.  Requires: A bowl of water, a steel needle, magnetite, prayer.
19- Mana Detection Dust.  A powder that when sprinkled on something, lights up to show where mana has affected it.  Shows you where someone has used or touched something within the recent past.  Time to build: 1 hour.  Requires: gravel, sand, water, ash, flour, urine.   
20- Hoverboard.  A board that levitates up to [dice]' off the ground and can move as fast as a horse.  Works for [sum] minutes before it needs to be recharged.  Time to build: 4 hours.  Requires: A small piece of wood or metal; platinum, gold and silver; sapphires and emeralds; a tooth from a lion; a feather from an eagle; a lock of hair from a horse.

                                                        by Florian Stitz

Building JuJus and Brewing Potions

Here are the rules of building a JuJu.

1.  You must have all the materials, the blueprint of the JuJu you want to build and at least 1 spellcasting dice remaining.
2.  Roll as many spellcasting dice as you want.
3.  If you roll doubles, roll 1d6 on the Workshop Mishap table.
4.  If you roll triples, roll 1d6 on the Workshop Catastrophe table.
5.  Assuming nothing went wrong, whatever spellcasting dice you rolled are expended and infused into the JuJu. 
6.  Further assuming the JuJu is not single use, you may recharge the JuJu with your spellcasting dice at any point, as long as you have a spellcasting dice remaining.  Any dice you use to recharge a JuJu are automatically lost and infused into a JuJu.
7.  As long the [dice] you are infusing into a pre-existing JuJu are fewer in number than the amount of [dice] originally used to create that JuJu, you need not roll on the Workshop Mishap or Catastrophe table.

Workshop Mishap

1- The JuJu suddenly starts working, randomly affecting everything around it as it normally should.
2- One of the JuJu's internal compartments opens and a snake slithers out onto your work station.
3- A cloud of energy fills the nearest 30', activating any JuJus or magic items in that space.
- The JuJu absorbs any other nearby JuJus or magic items, which form into a crude imitation of a body.  The JuJu then develops a new consciousness created by the overlapping fields of magic that were used to create it.  The JuJu is also a lot like the creator of those JuJus or magic items, fused into one person.  The JuJu Monster then flees the lab to pursue its own insane agenda.  It has all the powers of the JuJus and magic items that originally created it, along with X HD, which is the number of JuJus that created it.
4- The JuJu begins constantly playing music as if there is a tiny orchestra inside it whenever it has at least 1 spellcasting dice in it.  This effect is permanent.
5- The JuJu's effect slightly and permanently changes.  For example, if it is a Grenado, instead of exploding and hurting people, it instead explodes and sets them on fire, or sprays glitter and foam everywhere.      
6- The JuJu begins glowing and making an incredible racket, the light brightening and the sound intensifying for 1 round.  Then there is a great sound like a sigh, and nothing happens.  The JuJu then returns to normal.

Workshop Catastrophe

1- The JuJu electrocutes the next person who touches it, doing 1d6+[dice] lightning damage.
2- The JuJu catches fire.  The fire is non-magical.  
3- The JuJu attaches itself to the person closest to it in the lab and starts trying to merge with his body.  If it successfully merges with the person's body, he must save.  On a failure, he dies.  On a success, he lives, but he has a JuJu permanently attached to his body.
4- The JuJu absorbs any other nearby JuJus or magic items, which form into a crude imitation of a body.  The JuJu then develops a new consciousness created by the overlapping fields of magic that were used to create it.  The JuJu is also a lot like the creator of those JuJus or magic items, fused into one person.  The JuJu Monster then flees the lab to pursue its own insane agenda.  It has all the powers of the JuJus and magic items that originally created it, along with X HD, which is the number of JuJus that created it.
5- The JuJu melts into a puddle of molten, colorful slime.  It is destroyed.
6- The JuJu explodes, dealing [sum] damage to anyone within 10*[dice]', save for half.  The JuJu is destroyed by this explosion. 

Here are the rules for brewing a potion.

1.  You must have all the materials and at least 1 spellcasting dice remaining.
2.  Roll as many spellcasting dice as you want.
3.  If you roll doubles, roll 1d6 on the Alchemical Accident table.
4.  If you roll triples, roll 1d6 on the Alchemical Disaster table.
5.  Assuming nothing went wrong, whatever spellcasting dice you rolled are expended and infused into the potion.

Alchemical Accident

1- A fire starts.  It is non-magical in nature.
2- A cloud of choking gas floods the nearest 30'.  All within the cloud must save or develop a mutation.
3- A crystal forms in your work station, consuming any ingredients you were working with.  The crystal is pretty but non-valuable.
4- A pool of acid forms in your work space.  It begins dissolving everything it touches but glass, stone, plastic and ceramics.
5- A flickering hologram appears before you, displaying a stranger.  The stranger greets you and asks about your report.  The stranger knows your name, but seems confused about who you are.  The stranger will tell you that the last report you sent is dated 1 year from today.  1d6 minutes after contact is a made, the hologram disintegrates, leaving no trace that you were ever there. 
6- 1d8 thugs appear out of nowhere and assault the building the Alchemist is in.  When killed, the thugs dissolve into purple goo.

Alchemical Disaster

1- The potion or mixture the Alchemist is working on suddenly begin smoking and sputtering, glowing and shining and threatening to explode.  Then smoke floods the lab and when it clears momentarily, it leaves behind a translucent, dark green egg.  There is something alive inside that egg and if kept warm and safe, it will hatch soon.
2- Lightning strikes the lab and something explodes, spraying one random person inside the lab with chemicals.  That person must save.  On a failure, he dies.  On a success, he becomes a proper spellcaster and gains 1 spellcasting die.
3- A hellfire blaze starts in the lab.  Hellfire consumes only mana, leaving physical objects intact.  If it touches any living creature or magical item, it sucks the life out of it and burns it until the initial mana source is gone.  The only way to extinguish this fire is to starve it.      
4- A disturbing alchemical reaction begins occuring, filling the lab with smoke and flashing lights.  Then, after a series of increasingly grotesque noises, something emerges from the smoke.  What is it?  1dX [1= You, stark naked and confused.  The naked version of you asks if this is the current year; 2= Someone you know well, wearing black leather with an eye patch and an artificial limb.  They bring grave warnings from the future; 3= An unspeakable monster that is very friendly; 4= A beautiful creature that is immediately hostile.]
5- 1d8 purple goo monsters appear outside the building the Alchemist is in and begin attacking it.  When killed, they are revealed to be humans covered in purple slime.
6- A small, orange creature covered in thick fur appears in your work space, wielding a spear and a book of spells.  This is Mago of Kulzark, a traveling adventurer, scholar and warrior from the Microverse.  He is not to be underestimated.

                                                    by hdy9108


  1. I am here, the witness to your homestuck crimes

    1. I regret nothing. You'll never take me alive!

  2. Very clever and enlightening! Gives some excellent role-playing opportunities to those characters that can never quite come up with the necessary "outstanding" attribute to be that one special thing!